birth of amusement

Write, write, write. 

I am trying to write.

If I try hard enough,

If I give a hard fight;

fight the fright to write,

I might write alright.
 – me, 2020 

--------------------------------

Sup? 

I’m not sure what this blog is for anymore. I feel like I should tear it down, and from that, build a bigger and more purposeful platform where I can express so much more content other than these types of blog entries. It’s not that I hate doing this, it’s just exhausting being myself and performing this chunk of me in front of you—whoever you are. 

“Performing? But Kyla, whatever do you mean? Have you been lying to us all this time? Are you evil???” 

*slaps 

slap gtfo GIF


No. You see, to me, the internet is a place where everyone can perform. To put it figuratively, everyone is both a TV channel and an audience. What kind of show we put out is entirely up to us, and at the same time, the people who are watching us get to react however they want—were they simply entertained? Or did they get some sort of moral value? Or did they find it offensive? Or did they get some sort of benefit—or drawback—from what you shared/posted/published/expressed? 

Do you even care? 

Before you throw your no-I-don’t-really-care-because-I’m-cool-and-I-don’t-give-a-fuck-at-whatever-people-think-kind-of speech, let me break things down for you: 

1) This has nothing to do with the mammoth. In that 2014 blog entry (warning: it’s depressing), I talked about how we obsess over something that society demands in all of us, like, getting a job, earning <this> much money, etc., and we forget about much more important things like taking care of our mental health or something.

2) I believe that the only job humans need to fulfill is being a good person.

3) But if doing something good was easy, then a lot of people would be doing it by now.

What was my point, again? 

i forgot judith light GIF by Transparent

Oh yeah, performing. The word perform comes from old variations of words, but collectively meaning “to complete, to make, to bring out, and to accomplish”. The literal translation of perform in Tagalog is gumanap which comes from the root word ganap meaning “complete, fulfilled”. 

This place was once called Gallimaufry and it was my attempt to pour anything I can think of in this blog, and just share it to the world. That was just it. Each post was closed like a letter, with my sweet endearment, ‘Love, Kyla’;I found a rhythm to it and renamed the website because of that. Over time the motif changed because I realized how a few words impact people’s thoughts or decisions. It didn’t matter to me how many people were reading what I was writing, what mattered to me is the message I was getting across. 

emotional jason sudeikis GIF

And this is why I care. 

I built a skeleton and came up with an identity and a mission: “spread happiness and love despite of all the shit going on in this planet”. Ironically, I wasn’t in a good place when I thought of that sacred task but I still tried, and judging from what I published before and despite my sassiness, I think I did an okay job. I wanted people to know that it’s okay to feel shitty, and at the same time, accept that it’s not always going to be shitty. This world is so complex, but I think that we sometimes purposely ignore a simple formula and that’s compassion; and some of us push that away because their notion of this is false or worse, a sign of weakness. I’m for realsies when I say I want to spread kindness. I mean, what’s wrong with that? 

Choose Danai Gurira GIF by The Walking Dead

I’m not trying to delete this blog; I just want it to grow. I’m not sure what this blog is for anymore because I have so many things to say. 

A few months back, I decided to change it to The Love Club because I felt that it isn’t just about me anymore, this is something much larger and I really hope that I inspired/will inspire some of you to do something great or honorable; or to simply being kind to one another. 

shining schitts creek GIF by CBC

Since day one (2010, wow) I’ve been vocal about my career in journalism in this website, so you all know how much I’m a sucker for that. That being said, I want to create an archive of everything I want to write about, and share them with you guys. I’m not sure how to do it yet, but I’m excited. I’m rooting for it. 

I like sharing my thoughts with you and I love it even more when you get me—all the more when you live by some of the things I write. Come on, admit it, I probably gave you one of the best advices. No? Not once? Not even in person? *gasp Okay. Pfft. THEN WHY DO YOU KEEP COMING BACK TO MY BLO- I’m kidding, I love you. 

thank you so much wow GIF by THE NEXT STEP

As always, thank you for reading.


LOVE,



PLAYLIST: 

Die Trying by Michl
The End by The Beatles
Dance With U by Staring in Space
Our Own House by MisterWives
Lift Off by Tom Misch, Yussef Dayes, Rocco Palladino





Comments

  1. never thought I'd love you even more. Your compassion and character development can be seen by how/what you write.

    Please continue the sacred task we owe to everybody.

    Yours and this blog's existence is a hidden gem in the world wide web.

    For realsies,

    A fan

    ReplyDelete
  2. A very nice blog post, Kyla. I'm with you on this one. The goal is to be a good person. And yup, what to do about blog posts. I stress about them as well. There is, I'm afraid, no magic formula. We pour our hearts out and hope to connect. And we love to write. What a blessing during Covid. Stay safe. :)

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